Now, that I have sent back my Mary Kay Inventory, I can have peace of mind knowing that I will no longer have that distraction away from what matters in my heart. I am thankful to have joined Mary Kay and met some really nice women and am honored to continue to have them in my life. Although, I still have some product on my shelf, it’s not unbelievably overwhelming anymore. I hope to sell the rest of the products by the beginning of next year, so I can be free from my Mary Kay stuff.
So, knowing that I’m all done with Mary Kay, I’m very satisfied where my life is heading. Sure, there are still some issues weighing me down, and I’ll need to resolve it sometime . . eventually. But, for now, I’m content. I can kind of view the path ahead of me, but it’s still pretty blurry.
I’m sorting out my priorities and putting more time into pursuing the dreams of modeling and writing. Although, I do love writing, I have come to the realization that I will need to put extra attention on modeling. The prime time is happening now. I can always write at whatever age. I’m not saying I will put off writing. What I mean is, I will continue to write, probably put off entering contests and submitting to journals until things start happening on the other end. I can always do commercial modeling at any age, but there is a small window for high-fashion. High fashion is something that really interests me and lets face it, I’m already grazing the maximum age limit. Hopefully, with my good Asian genes, using Mary Kay TimeWise Miracle Set for 5 years and counting, and withholding putting on makeup until I was in college has put me at an advantage.
Although, I have decided to aim low and contact commercial agencies, I have not forgotten that time is of the essence in high-fashion. However, I need this little win for myself to gain the extra boost of confidence in order to successfully carry out my plan all the way. I have been planning for so long that I’m finally going to take the leap. This is risk for me and I better take it. To be one step closer to my goal is exhilarating and I’m so excited to see what’s to come!
I still hope to do some writing, especially my routine of 5-10 minutes every night. And post frequently, if not every day. Creating poems, random posts, journal entries, anything about my life is something that has been therapeutic since the start and has been helping me with whatever it is that has been going inside my head. Writing is my escape from the world around me to journal things about my past, present, and future. I especially love the idea of being able to look back at what I’ve written and what I’ve done. How I’ve progressed in writing and personally. It’s a great way to learn more about myself and continue to grow into the person I’ve always wanted to become. I just hope my head doesn’t focus on modeling too much that it neglects the one thing I’ve always counted on. And hopefully rebeccanne’s world doesn’t turn into rebeccanne’s modeling journey…
For now, my main topic is modeling, so I’ll stick to it. I still have a lot to say. There’s so much to prepare for. I’ve done the classes and the model mayhem and the one model place. I’m no longer looking to expand my personal portfolio and to gain the posing in front of the camera confidence. I keep it up solely for photographers to contact me regarding a shoot. However, I’m very picky with who I work with. I’m onto the next step in getting in shape and toned to meet with agents. I’ve auditioned for Mario, Make me a Model last February. I didn’t get in, but it did open 2 doors for me. For one, I was noticed by Nelida D’Alessandro for John Gialluisi’s group for Urban Native Hair Show to be their presentation model for March. It was such an awesome experience and I met amazing people, whom I’m still friends with today. The second door opened when Factor Women contacted me to meet. They said I had potential, but needed to meet the requirement and to be toned. At that time, I weighed 130 lbs. 27 inch waist and 37 inch hips. And the maximum requirement is actually 25 in. waist, and 35 in. hips.
With this knowledge, I finally knew what I needed to do. Unfortunately, I found out I had a blood clot in my lung and it prolonged everything I wanted to do. I rarely worked out. I stopped eating healthy. I … basically went back to my old habits, until July when I realized I needed help. The on and off depression and now anxiety was killing my spirit. I slowly got back on track and I’m getting better. My thoughts about life are getting better. And I’m happy. I’m content. I found help. Still battling through some struggles. But getting better. I started rebeccanne’s world. I’m eating healthier than ever before. Started doing those Arbonne Protein Shakes. They are pretty damn good, by the way! After the shakes and changing into a healthier lifestyle, I lost 5 lbs. I joined Lifetime and am currently meeting with a physical trainer to get myself in shape. Especially, considering with my limitations, the physical trainer designs a workout specifically for me! And with that, I lost another 5 lbs. I feel healthier, stronger, more in control of myself and my feelings, and more confident in myself.. My life is getting back together, kind of . . . slowly, but surely. I’m beginning to feel like me again with a little more oomph!
Now, my weight is at 120 lbs. with a waist of 25 ½ – 26 (this has been fluctuating) and a 35 hips. I. Am. Almost. There! By next week, I plan to submit my application and photos to all the commercial agencies I am interested in. My gosh, this is like applying to college! I wish. I pray. I hope. I dream. I would probably jump for joy squealing if I not only hear back from them wanting to meet, but also get SIGNED!
Yes! I know time is of the essence. I’m ready. Let’s go!
rebeccanne 加油！rebeccanne 加油！
加油 加油 加油 ~~~