It’s coming….

A new beginning I should say. A less dramatic start. But, it feels like such. It’s a big deal, at least to me it is.  I’m jumping for joy, literally… screaming in my head with happiness.  I’m gleefully at bliss, if that is even such a thing.

It starts from here.  It can only go up from here.  Well, of course, it’ll be terrible, if it continues to fall and go down.  Nobody wants that.  Everyone always yearns for their happy ending.  Nobody wants their life to sink.  How sucky that feeling is, to sink so low, to fall to the ground with no faith in yourself, and to feel hopeless thinking that nothing will be better?  Well, I like to live my life positively.  I like to entwine myself in the mist of optimism.  I hope for the best.  I dream for a million things and all will end in a good turnout.

Exciting as it sounds, this model life is never a dull ride.  Always different with new things and new people.  Always a different feeling.  A certain joy that comes over me.  A certain excitement when I learn a new trick.  It’s like being a toddler all over again.  Everything amazes me.

I got it.  That thing that is so important.  I’ll be in the New Gen Show in July… I got it, but what’s the catch?  I knew it wouldn’t come easy.  If I am not toned enough to walk confidently in a bikini for the show, I will have to wait until next year. This is how the industry works.  I get it.  I understand. I’m working out every single day, doing at least a 30 minute cardio session on my elliptical and then some. Doing a bunch of toning, thigh, leg, abs workout.  It helps with the sauna-like heat filling the living room, making me burn more.  I’m eating, so stop thinking I’m going to have an eating disorder.  I’m old enough to understand the downhill spiral of anorexia or bulimia, I’m just eating healthier than ever.  No sugar for me.  It’s hard, but I’m doing it. I have 35 days to gain that thigh gap the agents so desire, the clients so expect.  I have 35 days to get my abs, thighs, and arms toned. Can I do it? Is that physically possible?  Oh, GOD, I hope so.  And yes, Dear GOD, help me achieve this goal for this is something I want to do for myself.  I want to be apart of something so opportune.  This is THE door.  THE door that will lead to a million other doors and some will be open, some will be closed, and some with be slightly open. This is my way in and this is the start of a new beginning.

I’m also getting launched in the Factor Women New Gen website.  It should be happening in the next couple of days or so. For the days I haven’t been on the print board, I have been doing well on my own doing runway, so imagine what will happen when I get that boost from my agents in the print division? I think my career might actually skyrocket.  I think I have what it takes to be one of the best.  I hope so.  That would be such an amazing dream.  That would be such a beautiful thing to wake up to everyday.  My dream turning into reality?  How surreal, yet how real at the same time.  So be on the lookout, I’ll be posting the good news on my modeling facebook page and my Instagram.

Look out, Factor Chicago, this girl has the energy of perseverance on her side.  The never give up spirit.  The optimistic attitude.  I’ve got it and soon I’ll be unstoppable.